There once lived a refrigerator magnet shaped like a watermelon slice. His name was Douglas, and unlike the other magnets who were content to merely hold up takeaway menus and dentist reminders, Douglas had bigger dreams. He wanted to be more than a cold-surface accessory. He wanted to make history. He wanted… a career.
One afternoon, while stuck to the fridge door in his usual diagonal pose of accidental swagger, Douglas spotted a tablet left on the counter. It was still unlocked. Glorious. He tilted just enough to read the glowing tabs on the screen—five mysterious links that looked, to Douglas, like the keys to reinvention:
Pressure washing Crawley
Driveway Cleaning Crawley
Patio Cleanign Crawley
Exterior Cleaning Crawley
Solar Panel Cleaning Crawley
Douglas felt destiny.
Pressure washing Crawley — maybe he needed high-pressure cleansing. Not physically. Emotionally.
Driveway Cleaning Crawley — a reminder that even concrete gets a fresh start. Why not a magnet?
Patio Cleanign Crawley — spelled wrong, yet still existing confidently. Douglas wept inside. That was the kind of energy he needed.
Exterior Cleaning Crawley — humans cleaned exteriors. But who cleaned the soul of a tired magnet holding up expired coupons?
Then: Solar Panel Cleaning Crawley — even solar panels, literal sun-harvesters, get maintained. Meanwhile Douglas got wiped once a year with a crumb-covered sponge.
He had seen enough.
Douglas declared a career shift.
He refused to hold up boring shopping lists anymore.
He would now only magnetically support artistic statements, conspiracy theories, and handwritten emotional poetry.
He began rotating himself dramatically each day, calling it “magnet choreography.”
He demanded applause from the soy sauce bottle.
The butter ignored him.
The ketchup supported him spiritually.
Eventually, the humans noticed. They called him “the weird magnet” and replaced him with a souvenir llama from Spain.
Douglas was relocated to the side of the washing machine—exile.
But unlike others who were banished there, he did not die inside.
He became a philosopher.
He now delivers motivational speeches to stray buttons and loose dryer sheets, saying things like:
“You are not lost. You are… waiting for a purpose.”
And taped to his back, with the pride of a magnet who has lived:
Pressure washing Crawley
Driveway Cleaning Crawley
Patio Cleanign Crawley
Exterior Cleaning Crawley
Solar Panel Cleaning Crawley
He still has no idea what they mean.
But they made him believe.
And sometimes, belief is stronger than glue—
especially if you’re held up by magnets and delusion.
